A Letter To “My” Departed Dozer


Let me start by saying that Dozer was not mine, but although my brain keeps telling my heart that, my stubborn heart will never be able to comprehend that, therefore I say that he is “my” Dozer.

dozer1

My dear Dozer,

When I first met you, during a meet and greet, I was in awe of your size.  You, so far, are the biggest dog I’ve been fortunate and lucky enough to board, know, and love.  You were impressive, to say the least.  As I got to know you, I realized that what was more impressive than your size was the fact that you were sweet, loving, docile, and so easy to fall in love with.

Forgive me for not writing right away, but I was filled with anger and I did not think that that would have been the right time to write this letter to you.  Why angry?  Because you are gone, it is that simple.  While dwelling in my anger, I remembered reading somewhere that the reason why a dog happens to be in our lives is to teach us the many things we are unable to learn from other humans, and that a dog’s life is short because if it were to be long, we, humans, would not be able to cope with such a loss.  It actually made sense to me.

Before I had that epiphany, I was just sad, period.  At night, I could not stop thinking about you and so I started to cry.  Cynthia saw me and comforted me and told me the following:  “Dozer will be sorely missed, that is for sure,” then she said, “He farted when we were sitting at the table.  Didn’t you smell it?” I don’t know why, but for some odd reason I just laughed my butt off.  I truly needed that, but in all honesty, I did not smell your farts.  Thank you for that.

Cynthia, Alex and I are going to miss you dearly, and we hope the best to your pet parents while dealing with your loss.  I am not going to say good-bye to you, but rather I’ll see you later for I know we will see each other in the future.  Until then, a big hug and kiss from all of us.

Yours always,

Marcela

29 responses to “A Letter To “My” Departed Dozer

  1. Beautiful and very moving!

  2. Rest in peace Dozer! You are now in a place where pain, fear, and all negative things don’t exist, and only happiness surrounds you:)

  3. Quite touching and heartfelt. Dozer sounded like a beautiful soul.
    I liked your ‘epiphany.’
    Take care,
    Paul

  4. I was so sad to read this, just after seeing the beautiful photo essay of Dozer being your houseguest. Marcela, you are in my thoughts today.

  5. awwww . . . what a beautiful eulogy.

  6. Dozer sounds like the teacher you needed and I know he was well loved. Beautifully written.

  7. Beautiful words. I didn’t even know Dozer and I’m teary! He was a beautiful creature!

  8. Did you ever read “Man Meets Dog?” by Konrad Lorenz. It’s a great book and helped me so much when a dog of mine died. He said that one of the beautiful things about a dog is that the simplicity of them allows us to ‘replace’ them pretty easily with another one, so always get another one if you lose one. They aren’t like humans, he said, that have so many characteristics (besides farting) that we can never replace a loved one. Not that there isn’t a hole when a furry friend leaves, but as soon as another one enters our life a smile almost immediately is placed on our face. At least for me. I found his words comforting and true and always remembered them. Especially in the wake of all the tragedy in the world now. I wonder how the families deal with the loss of people every day….

    • No, I haven’t, but I’ll put it on my reading list. I do agree with you to a point. Yes, dogs are amazing and they do can be “replaced” but there is always one or two that your heart just aches for regardless of how long he has been gone. For me, and this is just my opinion, every dog is unique and for that reason that dog will always remain in my heart and soul. The first dog that broke my heart, was actually my mom’s dog, Bambino. It took me 10 years before I got my first dog at the insistence of my girlfriend. 10 long years. What did I learn from it? Not to be afraid to love. When you love you will hurt, but I look at it this way: I’d rather love deeply and get hurt rather than never had felt such an amazing feeling because then I would have missed so much in life.

      • I think he was just comparing them to humans and how losing a human that is very, very close to us must be so incredibly devastating. I can’t comprehend because I never have while I have lost many pets. Some dogs that, as you, I have loved so very dearly. My wonderful dog now is sometimes all I have I feel, even though I have daughters….so I get what you mean completely.

      • Regardless of whether the loss is that of a human of a pet, at least for me, it is an excruciating painful experience. But you know what? I would not change a thing. And why should I? I have loved deeply and dearly, and yes I have ached like hell when I have lost, but I was all worth it.

      • ‘Tis better to have loved and lost
        Than to have never loved at all….

      • You are so right:)

  9. Marcela, I feel your pain. We lost a sweet old soul that I boarded and also cried like he was my own. His name was Courage and my husband nicknamed him Old Man. He died in December and my heart still aches with the void that is now there. I had the pleasure of boarding his brother, Guiness, this past week and often times I looked quick and swear Courage was right beside him! I pray your heart lightens as you remember the great times you had with Dozer. I will send my love to all that loved and lost this sweet giant. Linda @ http://www.dogbonecentral.com

    • Thanks Linda. Yes, they do not have to be ours for us to love them. It is hard, but we keep all those amazing memories with us. That is amazing. You can actually feel Courage around. My sister told me that she felt her dog, Julito, for about a week after he passed away. Again, thank you for your kind words.

  10. RIP….dear Dozer….and cross that rainbow bridge…. where all that went before you are waiting…. and where you in your turn will wait because all dogs go to heaven… this I believe without doubt… but, I miss my friends so badly…. and understand your sorrow and anger and feelings of loss…

  11. What a wonderful tribute to a wonderful dog…. my tears are rolling now, its so hard to say good bye…

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